Posted in Diet

Struggles

I did not go to the gym yesterday. I don’t know what it is about Mondays. I did not wake up until 3 PM because of the medication that I took. It was for a really painful crick in my neck. I still have the pain even now. I will make it to the gym today, neck pain or not.

I am sure that I have gained some weight over the weekend as well. My diet is still terrible on the weekend. I am either eating too much, or not eating enough. And I most certainly am eating a lot of foods that are not good for me.

Today I will start at the top of the body as if it was my monday, and work my shoulders. I will follow my weekly schedule as if today is Monday. That means I will have to go to the gym on Saturday to finish out my workouts.

My goal is not to give up and that seems to be a challenge that I face at the beginning of every week. I have heard it said that it takes 21 days to create a habit. That does not seem to be true when it comes to going to the gym and working out. There is nothing ritual or ha it forming about me going to the gym. I have to fight my desire to quit every single day.

This is why my only goal at this point is don’t quit. I cannot even look forward to my desired weight and shape of my body. I just have to have faith that that will happen as long as I don’t quit.

Even though I have lost over 20 pounds so far I am still seeing a fat man in the mirror. That fuels my desire to want to quit. This is my battle almost every day. As I have said in other post I have noticed subtle changes in my body. But I still see the fat man in the mirror. He just stands there staring back at me wiggling his big fat titties in my face. Then he starts bouncing up-and-down showing me how his fat belly shakes when he moves. He really pisses me off.

Okay, that was pretty weird so I guess I’m done now. Wish me luck in the gym today.

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Author:

Was a music major. Spent 20 years in the Navy Band Program. Lived in in Florida 10 years. Have been in SC for 6 years.

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